Burnout, Trauma, and Reflective Functioning

Burnout in priests is complex. Generally, the dimensions of burnout are understood to be:

1. Emotional exhaustion (overwhelm, depleted emotional and physical resources)
2. Depersonalization (disconnection from self and others, often with negative emotionality or cynicism)
3. (low) Personal accomplishment (decreased efficiency, satisfaction, and/or productivity)

Two analyses of the scientific research on occupational stress and burnout highlight how the lives of priests are complex, making it difficult to say what causes or prevents burnout across the board (Picornell-Gallar & González-Fraile, 2024; Ruiz-Prada et al., 2021). Priests who are younger, introverted, less emotionally stable and more cognitively rigid may be more prone to burnout, yet individual differences seem to be quite significant. 

One theme I would like to draw out is depersonalization, in particular the aspect of disconnection from self. Priests – especially diocesan priests and those in active apostolates – spend the majority of their day interfacing with other people. The line between professional and personal spheres is often barely distinguishable. Where does one go when stress rises in relationship with with one’s superior, parishioners, staff, friends, and/or self? In my observation, sometimes the solution is to disconnect from one’s own needs in order to preserve an ounce of sanity or relief in another sphere. If that disconnection is temporary and infrequent, that’s okay – even healthy – but when does it tip toward burnout?

Think of a time when you experienced chronic stress, and ignored a need that you had. Maybe you have learned to ignore physical and emotional needs to get through a long day. That might work for a day or two, or once or twice a week. However, when we chronically disconnect from our humanness in one area of experience (emotional, physical, spiritual, relational, sexual, etc.), that naturally puts pressure on another area. Even with the grace of ordination and doing God’s work, our humanness can only take so much of that pressure. Pressure brings rigidity, and therefore less flexibility to navigate the conflicts, disappointments or even boredom of the following days and weeks. Eventually, signs of burnout can emerge in thoughts such as “why am I doing this?” or “what is the point?” regarding something you once valued or enjoyed.

Trauma

As a trauma-focused psychotherapist, people often ask me “so what qualifies something as traumatic?” In my opinion, the best answer from the world of psychology is that an experience may be traumatic for people when they are inadequately prepared and/or supported to process it. The experience exceeds the coping abilities of the individual – at that time (Gold, 2017). A psychological wound has developed.

There are many things in our fallen world that we were not originally designed to process and may exceed our ability to cope in some way. For example, our digestive systems are not designed to process a 72-ounce steak or a full box of donuts in one sitting. At least mine is not… However, some people’s systems are not at all prepared to digest steak or donuts without adverse effects and needing medical support. For other people, steak or donuts may be okay on some days, but not others. 

This is where our individual window of tolerance comes in (Siegel, 1999). The window of tolerance (WoT) is an image used to describe our capacity – or bandwidth – to tolerate pleasing and distressing experience (interactions, emotions, sensations, thoughts, memories, etc.). For a person to respond to a situation in a conscious, intentional way, the intensity of his response to the stimulus must remain within his WoT. If the experience exceeds what he can tolerate, one of two things happens:

1) Hyper-arousal. This can include becoming highly emotional, reactive, frozen, and/or triggered. More than just emotional overload, the whole body is in overdrive. 

2) Hypo-arousal. This can include feeling disengaged, appearing emotionally flat and unresponsive, and depersonalization. The body may feel numb, tired or even ‘not here.’

Our WoT is formed by our earlier experiences. When an individual develops a pattern of depersonalization (a type of hypo-arousal) in response to stress, this likely began as a trauma response (Simeon et al., 2001). Sometimes, this can be prompted by life-threatening events in adolescence or adulthood. More often, it is formed within early relationships. Infants and children with attuned caregivers learn to connect with themselves and their own human needs by how parents and caregivers respond to them. The baby learns that he can experience hunger or pain, and have that need met or pain soothed. Conversely, when neglect and/or abuse are present, he learns that needs are not important, are overwhelming or unsolvable, that he must always deal with them himself, or even that having needs is dangerous. All of this learning is unconscious. Early neglect and/or abuse often results in psychological wounds that we call ‘trauma.’ 

While one’s Window of Tolerance is formed by earlier experience, it also fluctuates day-to-day and sometimes minute-to-minute. When your stress is lower, and you feel prepared and/or supported around that ‘one more thing’ that disrupts the flow of your day, you may be able to handle it without ill effects. In times of higher stress when you have more on your plate, your WoT will probably be more constricted and responses of hypo- or hyper-arousal are more likely. There is no room for ‘one more thing,’ whatever it is.

Bringing it Together

Burnout and trauma are friends. Meaning, burnout – and an overall reduced coping capacity or WoT – makes one more likely to experience an event as traumatic. And, a history of traumatic experience makes one more likely to ignore or respond unhelpfully to one’s needs and signs of mounting burnout. Too often, priests are tempted to believe that if they need help, or need to slow down, then they must not believe in the graces of Ordination – or perhaps they are simply inadequate. Not true.

Ready for a remedy? Reflective functioning, or mentalizing is a skill that is crucial to psychological well-being in adulthood. It is the functional opposite of depersonalization. It can lessen the effects of earlier trauma, and moderate the currents that may pull a priest toward burnout. Reflective functioning refers to the ability to perceive and interpret our own and others’ behavior as an expression of certain needs, attitudes, desires or goals (Brugnera et al., 2023). One’s ability to mentalize is strong when these can be noticed with accuracy and certainty. For example, if I know that I am feeling disappointed, and what evoked that emotion, I can probably also identify the desire or goal that was thwarted. When I notice that I am responding brusquely to someone, I can identify what else might be going on, and make an adjustment or apology quickly. Conversely, if I am not aware that my face takes on a pained look and I become irritable with others when I am hungry, my interpretation of others’ response to me will be erroneous and I may conclude that I am a disappointment to them – rather than realizing that I need to schedule a lunch break. Or, if my default response is to avoid conflict, I may take on responsibilities that are not mine and later feel overwhelmed with no reprieve in sight.

Reflective functioning is a skill that is most naturally built in relationship. If you notice that you struggle with depersonalization, or often make harsh or erroneous interpretations of your own and others’ emotions and behaviors, this may be an area where you need help to build this area of relating to yourself. Sometimes friends or an attuned family member can help with a reflection to get you started, such as “Were you tired?” or “When I do that, it usually means ____. Could that be it for you?” An attuned spiritual director will help you to work on reflective functioning via how God sees you. If trauma is in your history, and signs of burnout are present, you do not need to delay healing your relationship with yourself any longer – please reach out to a psychotherapist.

For your reflection:

• What is an example of how you know you are out of your Window of Tolerance? Begin to gather data to build your reflective functioning skills in this area by noticing when this tends to happen, and what internal or external cues precede it.
• Practice slowing down and noticing your behaviors and emotions – without judgement. Doing this in the moment or at least on the same day is best. You could think of it as a psychological Examen. 
• Is there a situation in which you feel unprepared and/or unsupported? Seek training and support in this area, or delegate or refer to someone who has the necessary skills.
• When a recurring need or an unhealed wound is identified, prioritize seeking the appropriate help and intervention promptly.

References

Brugnera, A., Zarbo, C., Scalabrini, A., Compare, A., Mucci, C., Carrara, S., Tasca, G. A., Hewitt, P., 

Greco, A., Poletti, B., Esposito, R., Cattafi, F., Zullo, C., & Lo Coco, G. (2023). Attachment 

anxiety, reflective functioning and well-being as predictors of burn-out and psychological 

distress among psychotherapists: A longitudinal study. Clinical Psychology & 

Psychotherapy, 30(3), 587–598. https://doi.org/10.1002/cpp.2823

Gold, S. N. (Ed.). (2017). APA handbook of trauma psychology: Foundations in knowledge. 

American Psychological Association. https://doi.org/10.1037/0000019-000

Picornell-Gallar, D., & González-Fraile, E. (2024). Burnout syndrome among Catholic clergy: A 

systematic review. Journal of Religion and Health, 63(3), 1830–1848. 

https://doi.org/10.1007/s10943-023-01883-8

Ruiz-Prada, M., Fernández-Salinero, S., García-Ael, C., & Topa, G. (2021). Occupational stress and 

Catholic priests: A scoping review of the literature. Journal of Religion and Health, 60(6), 

3807–3870. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10943-021-01352-0 

Siegel, D. J. (1999). The Developing Mind. Guilford Press.

Simeon, D., Guralnik, O., Schmeidler, J., Sirof, B., & Knutelska, M. (2001). The role of childhood 

interpersonal trauma in depersonalization disorder. The American journal of psychiatry, 

158(7), 1027–1033. https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.158.7.1027